When I told my friend that I wanted to do philosophy, the first question she asked was, “Why!?” The tone had both an exclamation mark and a question mark. I think a lot of people might feel that way. Why would anyone want to pursue philosophy? It’s not a highly promising career track; in fact, it’s a discipline very much on the decline.

When I told her that I had considered doing a masters and then a PhD but then changed my mind and now I wanted to do philosophy just for my own sake, she was even more confused. The incredulous ‘why’ with two punctuation marks, was for me pursuing an academic career. Wanting to do philosophy as a hobby, was something that was completely incomprehensible to her. It just confirmed for her that I was “super weird”. And I think a lot of people feel this way about philosophy.

I experience a similar sense of confusion, but for questions on the other end of the weirdness spectrum. When someone asks me fairly normal questions like, “Do you want to catch a movie?” or “What do you want for dinner?” I feel an existential dread, because I don’t know how to answer such questions, because right now, I’m not philosophically grounded. Let me explain.

A question like the ones above is a surface level question. There are deeper questions hidden underneath. Would I want to catch a movie? Well, first of all, which movie? But then, go one step down and you’re asking me if I want to participate in the cultural trend of going to a large hall and sit in darkness with strangers and watch a movie for anywhere from 90 minutes to 3 hours, during which, inevitably, people will talk, babies will cry, someone will check their phone etc. Why would anyone want to watch a movie this way? To me the best way to watch a movie is to use headphones and be comfy at home and watch it alone so that no one can distract you.

Go deeper still and what you’re asking me is if I believe in consuming visual stories for the sake of entertainment and whiling away time. You want to know where I stand on the topic of productivity and how best to spend time. What do I think of beauty and is current cinema creating beauty? Another step deeper, you’re asking me what I think the meaning of life is, and whether consuming beauty is worthwhile or should we be pursuing some other interests?

That begets the question of what is life? Which leads to: what is the universe? And so, you can imagine my frustration when I’m asked such questions and I say, “ummm…” and people get angry at me for not being able to make simple decisions.

To me it’s unbelievable that people can live life without thinking about philosophical questions. That’s like buying a device and not reading the manual or not learning how to maintain it. Which is also something most people do, and I find extremely annoying.

I can understand if you don’t think that philosophy, per se, is the way to build a foundation for your life. Honestly, I much respect a religious person who might say, “no I can’t eat that or watch that movie because it goes against my religious belief.” At least their decisions are grounded in something. It’s the people who don’t have any grounding, who float around from trend to trend, without ever taking the time to think about what they truly want, who confuse me.

This is why I want to do philosophy. I want to figure out the foundations of my thinking so I can figure out which movie to see and what to eat.